Some days I feel like rock star mom of the year. Nice Mom. Patient, supportive, calm in my discipline, or shall we say, redirection. I encourage their creativity and love of nature. I help to bring to light their strengths and remind them that every one of us has our weaknesses, no one is perfect. I feed them organic snacks and limit their sugar intake. We stay busy, in a healthy, not overly rushed way of course, and we even remember to say our prayers. Sigh, isn't it magical? It can happen ya know? Once in a blue moon, when all the stars align and the winds blows just the right way. And it usually lasts about....oh...a couple of hours tops.

There must be an In Between Mom somewhere in the middle of this shit right? Not over coddling, but not screaming like a banshee. Just right, like baby bear's porridge. That is where I strive to be. I don't want to be a perfect mom. I don't believe in perfect. But I would love to be consistent, and level headed, an example of self control and positive thinking. I would rather model the appropriate way for us to talk to one another instead of feeding the fire with yelling. I don't want to be a "do as I say not as I do" parent. This mom thing is a big ass job, with so many implications. It's also real life, with real people, real feelings and frustrations, disappointments and dreams. And so, today, as I write, I take a deep breath. Deep into my belly, deep into my soul, and forgive myself for not being the In Between Mom yet. I understand that I will flutter back and forth. I'll have great mom days, and crappy mom days. I'll do things wrong, say things I maybe shouldn't and loose my cool sometimes. I'll be an inspiration, a rock of support, cheerleader and their safe haven too.
I'll be the best me I can be, each day, knowing each day is a different day then yesterday, and tomorrow is a new one. I'll try to give myself and my kids grace. I'll drink my coffee in the morning and my wine before bed and keep putting one foot in front of the other. That can't turn out that bad right?!
xoxo
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