Monday, January 4, 2016

Sharpen Your Spade and Dig Deeper

Happy New Year lovies! 2016 is upon us. We are a full four days into it. I've had different versions of this subject brewing in my mind since the last couple of weeks of December and decided tonight to just start writing and see which version wants to flow.

I spent some time over the last month just being, noticing, taking mental notes, day dreaming a bit. I guess, kind of down loading the last 12 months and preparing myself for the new year ahead. Readying myself to close the book on 2015 and start a fancy sparkly new novella for 2016. Upon first glance last year may have looked to be any other run of the mill 12 months. Kids, hubby, work, fun times, hard times, all the usual. As I looked a little closer things began to jump out. Like little kids in a classroom with their arms shooting out of their body, practically jumping out of their seats, with their eyes popping out of their heads..."me me see me, notice me, I know I know!" (That brings such a visual of my first born because I just KNOW he does that). So I slowed down on my reflection and gave each of those little know-it-alls a chance to speak. "You started a blog this last year!" one of them declared with excitement. "You started really practicing yoga in 2015" the other one said matter of factly with a smug look on her face. "You began a new journey this last 12 months Trisha. You began to see with the eyes of your soul instead just seeing out of the eyeballs in your head. You began to listen to the little girl inside. You grew, you changed..." Now this one, this one was announced by the quiet girl in the center of the room. She looked right through me, to my center. She spoke calmly but with compassion, strength, and clarity. All three of them told the truth.

After time spent in reflection I wanted to contemplate the year ahead. I wanted to think about resolutions. I came to a decision and wanted to share it with you. I think we need to revolutionize the way we look at new years resolutions guys. I think we need to turn the whole thing upside down and shake it around. I think we need to sharpen our spades and dig deeper, much much deeper. What are some of the typical resolutions that we make each year? I am going to exercise more. I'm going to eat clean. I'm going to cut back on caffeine. I'm going to get a promotion. I'm going to save $2000 by the end of the year. I'm going to be a "better" mom/dad/wife/husband. I'm going to quit smoking. I'm going to stop spending so much money on things I don't need. Blah blah blah. And I'm sure most of us make those resolutions with intentions of following through for more than just the first month of the year. Some of us may even actually pull some of that off. But is this the best we can do?

Let's bulldoze past that layer of shizalea shall we? Let's get to the heart of the matter. Ya, our body is our temple, therefore those resolutions are "good" ones. We need to take care of ourselves, be healthier, all that jazz. I'm not doubting that, but I do believe there is so much more to blessing our bodies than loosing weight, becoming more fit, or dieting. The outside is a reflection of the inside. The aches and pains, the high blood pressure, the sore back, even the muffin top...all stuff on the outside that are results of the lack of attention to the inside. And, not just the inside guts and veins and stuff, the inside like your heart and soul and stuff.

I believe we make those resolutions to try to fool ourselves into thinking we are taking care of business. To prove to ourselves we are working at life, trying to be better, healthier, happier, but without doing the real work. The real work is an inside job. The real work requires self reflection, quieting our minds, feeling those things we have been trying so hard for years not to feel. Looking at our insides and accepting the fact that we have been hiding. Acknowledging that we CAN dig deeper than we usually do but we don't because it's freaky and uncomfortable. Because we are afraid of change and it hurts to grow. Because to see it is to know it and to know it means you have to deal with it.

Maybe this year, those of us that are willing make a non resolution to see ourselves. To notice how are words, thoughts, actions and intentions affect us and the people around us. To observe the way we treat people and other living things, To take responsibility for the place we hold in the soul of this entire universe and the role we play in it's healing.

I've sharpened my spade. I am ready to dig deep. A little scoop at a time, slowly deeper. I will go into this next year with soul eyes open. I will be a conscientious gardener of my thoughts and remember that the seeds I plant affect us all. I want to plant pretty flowers for you and for me.

Happiest New Year <3


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