Wednesday, October 26, 2016

What I Want for My Birthday This Year

My birthday is in two days. The hubs keeps asking me what I want. I keep saying I'll think about it. There are a few things I would like. A cool new Desire Map planner for next year. Some new crystals or oils. A new statue for my space around the shed. Books, lots of books, you can never go wrong with books. Even a few things I need, like a new juicer or a new massage table. I silently ask him in my head..."do you have any idea what I would like for my birthday? What would put a smile on my face and in my heart? I know you do if you think hard enough."

As I was cleaning up outside this morning (insert picking up dog poop), I realized what I want for my birthday. It's a doozy (not like a presidential election do-over or immediate world peace doozy, but still), and I think he is going to wish he would have just bought me something and quit asking.

I want our home to be a place of peace, comfort, encouragement and support. I want it to serve as a haven for this little family of ours. Like a bubble of unwavering light and love. So what does that mean? How can he give me that? How can the boys wrap that one up for me and give it to me with pancakes and coffee in bed on Friday?

Am I delusional to think that this is a possibility? A house with a man, 2 boys, 2 dogs, a frog, a turtle and me. There is constant activity within these walls. Lots of noise, lots of banging, and just pretty much a steady stream of kids in and out. It's a small place, we don't have a ton of room. Things are stashed in every nook and cranny. There is always dog hair and dirt from outside on the hard wood floor and dirty finger smudges on the trim around the doors. Dishes and laundry are always needing to be done and dusting doesn't happen enough.

But I think, the most important thing in the house is the vibe. The feeling you get when you are in it. Do you walk in and feel relaxed or tense? Do you walk in to a place that smells like home and that puts a little warm ball of contentment in your chest? Do you move around the space feeling free yet supported? Unhindered? Or do you feel tied down or boxed up? Do you feel open? Free to say what you want to say or sing what you want to sing. Free to speak your mind without getting told to quit talking? Free to share your dreams without getting judged or made to feel that those dreams are silly or unattainable. Do you feel like the people here support you to take chances and be unique?

The vibe is the energy right? The energy from the people in the house. The energy they bring in after a tough day. The energy that gets shared when someone is excited about a new idea. The energy that permeates like fog when there is discontent or unspoken frustration. The energy that lights up everyone in the space when someone feels completely and truly loved for who they are at that moment.

The vibe doesn't lie. You can't have a pretty house with a yucky energy and still have a pleasant vibe. The vibe is what it is, and it is directly due to the energy brought to the space, and held in the space, and fed in the space.

So I want our vibe to be high! I want our vibe to be joyful yet soothing. I want our vibe to allow for mistakes and learning. I want our vibe to encourage growth, taking risks, and living each day to the fullest. I want our vibe to be filled with unconditional, unwavering, constant love and kindness. I want there to be honest open communication and void of passive aggressive comments.

I want each of us to be free to do the things that keep us healthy and make us happy, without feeling guilty, or like we are burdening the rest of the tribe.

Each one of us, being whole, and who we are meant to be.

Loved and accepted fully.

Respected.

Cherished.

Celebrated for our own uniqueness.

I want each of us to be responsible for our health. Our physical health, our mental health and our spiritual health. For our vibe to encourage health in all of these areas.

I want us to be a team.  A team that enjoys time together and allows for time apart. A team that feeds one another the good stuff. The stuff that builds up. The stuff that makes stronger. The stuff that makes hearts and minds healthy, happy and free.

So, this high vibe business takes work. It takes reflection and patience. It takes thoughtful choices and discussions. It takes honesty and vulnerability. It requires letting go and facing fears. It asks us to allow for failure and to even be grateful for it if, and when, it comes. It requires tears and hugs and quiet time. It's fed by nature, breath, faith and compassion.

Probably woulda been easier to ask for a gift card huh? Haahaa! Good things...really amazing, awesome things, are rarely easy.

Raise the vibe ya’ll.